“Yeah, don’t worry I know this.”
This is our normal tendency when somebody needs an advice. But, when someone other gives us an advice, we are like, “what? What is this guy talking about?” at least in our heads. We are humans and all of us think differently and most of us think that our advice is the best. It may or may not be taken in the right context. But that’s how we think.
You don’t have to be an entrepreneur to give a great advice on entrepreneurship; you don’t have to be a writer in order to give great advice about writing. It is not mastering the competency; it is merely a “good judgement” about being able to give great advice to anybody. Read more about it here in this HBR article.
A great adviser is someone who checks facts, is clearly aware of who needs the advice, what their background is and whether the person receiving their advice can afford it or not. The person getting advice then most certainly wins. It gives a sense of achievement, decision making ability and makes them supremely confident to pursue what they are after.
A right advice helps in creating effective leaders. Leaders can make balanced and bold decision which is backed by their sense of factually aware conscience. Every leader has an idol that they admire and took inspiration from. Very early in their lives they have learnt from their idols, took their advices by reading about them, listening to their speeches, and getting influenced by their life in a whole.
Advice vs Opinion
Instead of saying “I can give great advice”, we can say “this is my opinion”. Sound much better and feels lighter. Giving ‘advice’ is considered to be coming from someone who has tremendous amount of knowledge of the subject he is talking about and someone who possess deep insights. On the other hand, opinion can be a great perspective but may or may not be taken seriously. And thus finds its way much faster into the listeners system. We should give our opinion and the listener can take it as an advice.
Successful people are great advisers, is a myth!
There is a misleading, unwritten rule that states if a quote giving advice comes from someone famous, very old, or Greek, then it must be good advice – Bo Bennett
People take advice of really successful people very seriously even if they are talking non-sense. Can we give better advice than a highly successful person, yes! But would people agree to it. Perhaps, they don’t. Because we always imagined that people who have attained a certain position in their life are the best to listen to. That’s exactly why most of the advices go in vain. We loose and then curse ourselves for not performing well. It’s not your fault! Somebody messed it up in a big way and because the world think they are great you also never want to distrust what they said. A myth created by humans for humans.
Fault of the education system
The way we are been taught in schools is sometimes so lame, which is to follow great people and listen carefully to what they have to say. Be disciplined and never think out of the syllabus or out of what the herd thinks. But when we actually land up in the world of jobs, we realize that we could have done better had we thought a little out of the box and took ourselves not so seriously after failures. This is exactly when bad advisers come and take advantage, consciously or unconsciously. We listened to them and we kind of surrender ourselves to a random person with gray hair who may or may not be a great leader or figure. This is why so many students drop off from schools and colleges to pursue their dreams as they couldn’t take it anymore. Had they been given the right advice at the right time of their developmental age, they would have achieved much greater successes much earlier in their life.
Don’t be repetitive; and be concise
Delivering the same kind of message over and over again with an intent to influence readers or listeners is also not a good choice. You got to change every time you step up, customize according to the need of the one who needs an advice. When you are not repeating, you also display your versatility and command over your subject. Also the message could be big or small but it should be impactful enough that people can engage, but preferably, small to begin with. The message will always be taken positively by the depth of its context and not by its length.
Don’t worry, we are all humans!
Start from a perception of nothing is proved as wrong or right advice. It is just your opinion and nobody should file a lawsuit against you if they feel offended due to it. It’s your wisdom and you believe strongly about it. If people believe in it, they will take it. If they don’t want to take it, it will teach you a lesson to come up with something good next time.
Give advice with as much honesty as possible as it can make or break somebody’s life or career. Really, at the end what matters is why and what advice you are giving to someone. Not, whether you are an expert or not. Not whether you are a 12 year or 65 year old. Listen to your conscience first and then agree/disagree to somebody’s advice and not because they are successful right now. It may have worked for them, but may be not for you.